This is a sensible and serious post from me today, so settle down and get ready!
Not that long ago I took a mini break from daily blogging because I was 'feeling a bit crap' and I feel that now is a good time to discuss anxiety with people.
Anxiety is shit, let's just start with that.
There are lots of different types of anxiety, ranging from Panic Disorders to OCD. There is also the little bitch of a thing called Social Anxiety Disorder, and that's what i'm here to talk about.
Social anxiety disorder, also called social phobia, is an anxiety disorder in which a person has an excessive and unreasonable fear of social situations. Anxiety (intense nervousness) and self-consciousness arise from a fear of being closely watched, judged, and criticized by others.
Recently it's gotten really bad. It has reached the stage where I won't walk into a room on my own, meaning that when all of my housemates are in the kitchen socialising I won't go in there. Going on a night out is horrible, it's reached the point where I often find myself not enjoying the night out and then walking home because I feel shit about ruining the night for everyone else.
There is no way to just get over it, trust me I've tried!
I've been told i'm just shy and I need to 'get over it' and I've been told that putting myself in situations where I feel anxious will help. These are both wrong and 9/10 I feel worse afterwards than I did before!
I'm writing this because today, 10th October, is World Mental Health day and i'm sick of feeling like this. I'm sick of being told to 'get over it' and i'm sick of being told that i'm over exaggerating and i'm sick of being told that I can't feel bad because people have it worse.
I feel like writing this post and actually publishing it might make me feel better, i'm not sure how but i'm going to give it a go. It has actually taken me a long time to write this post, adding a bit here and there each day for quite a while, and i'm already feeling nervous about posting it.
C'ya!
Emily xo